40 degree.

Good evening..

sigh..

first of all, i am not sick or having a high fever.. 40 degree means i reach the point where my gloominess and sadness are reaching the highest point in my life :( this posts will be another of my curcol or sad and gloomy post :( i'm sorry for not posting any interesting and inspiration story. lately i've been feeling gloomy and not in the right mind..

so, today is sunday and i'm still on my semester break. i should be in indo right now, but i'm a good girl, i have to obey my parents :( anyway, the reason why i'm gloomy lately because i've been missing my home so much. i miss it so much, it hurts. that's how bad it is. it may sounds cheesy and too much, but i really do miss home.

i miss how me and my family go to the mall or some place fun after church, i miss going to church with my family in the morning, i miss having dinner together every 6 pm, i miss having an appropriate lunch and dinner, i miss the warm-cooked rice and delicious home made dishes. i miss my goofy dad who always rub my head and telling me advice in my study, i miss shopping in Mangga Dua with my mom, going to the salon together, do mother-daughter bonding time together. i miss playing around with my annoying yet loveable sister, i miss gossipping with her before going to bed, i miss eating Pizza Delivery with her when my parents are not around, i miss our useless fight. i miss mbok for paying attention, i miss mbok's talkative and random saying, i miss mbok.

i miss going to Emporium every saturday and meet my bf in Gramedia, i miss watching new random movies with my bf in XX1, i miss eating Shillin's tempura with my bf after watching movies, i miss holding his hands and those feeling of butterfly in the tummy. i miss his annoying yet romantic side of him whenever we're together.

i miss everything, and not all that i miss right now is listed. i reach the point where i am not in the right mind and not able to looked back :(

me and you ;)

we don't have a lot of pictures together, we were not a camera-hore that time. now i realize that, we need to take a lot of pictures together..

some people said that most of ldr will not work out, some of my friends end their ldr because one of them is giving up. sometimes i think of that too.. whether me and him will work out or not. it's hard to think what the future holds. negative thoughts haunted me like crazy, my heart was full of fear and anxious. i mean, we're still young and there are a lot of things we need to do. but when you're dealing with a broken heart, it feels as if you have nothing left to lose. it's surprising how much sadness, breaking up can bring. i've been there and done that, so i know how it feels and it doesn't feel good. especially when you're in ldr........... let's stop it right there, we're going nowhere.

yeaa.. so that's it.. i hope you enjoy another of my grumble and gloomy story.. :(
wish me luck :) i hope i'll grow stronger!

be blessed and God bless!